...calling it what it 'should' be.

i have somewhat, been away.
only diving online mostly as a spectator,
not in the mindset to be a contributor.

mostly because, i like to think before i talk.
i like there to be significant reasons why i am saying what i say,
i like my words to be set in some meaning,
a real, significant meaning.
not some superficial current state, brought upon some simple passing circumstance.
we feel so many things, in so many moments,
some i prefer more than others.
some i want to highlight,
some i don't.

& lately, i haven't gotten many moments to not only think,
but to execute,
in regards to personal work.
but this is okay,
because taking time to observe,
is something i enjoy,
& find necessary.
so in the mean time,
i've been storing up some amazing variables,
that will inevitably show themselves,
through something that i offer from the insides of me.

i tweeted some thought process i had yesterday.
it was a reaction to things i have been handling,
as well as how i was handling them.
keeping my perspective in check,
not letting defeat reach my imagination,
& only think on rest & peace & success.
to me, i have no choice.
when faced with circumstances,
that could either get much worse,
& begin eating away at my sustainability.
i have no room for negativity. none.
i cannot play with the addictiveness of being a victim,
i must, must, must, keep my head not only above water,
but in the clouds; where my help comes from!
therefor my choices & actions will be reflective of my thoughts,
secure, safe, hopeful, expectant, faithful, joyus!

it wasn't until i experienced circumstances,
that could bring true fear to my heart,
& commit to a reaction to them,
that i could speak on something worth saying.

...sometimes it's better to call it what it should be, instead of what it is.
— ashmytash (@averyashlay) February 27, 2015

not denying the reality, but stating faith. the belief that what you're believing for will manifest.
— ashmytash (@averyashlay) February 27, 2015

...with having good reason to believe for that.
— ashmytash (@averyashlay) February 27, 2015

& a 'good' reason is specific to every life. some are logical, some are 'special'
— ashmytash (@averyashlay) February 27, 2015

i say what i say about stating faith, because i always see eagerness to highlight the bad, when actually a repetitive cycle of stating good,
— ashmytash (@averyashlay) February 27, 2015

...could change the entire energy of this world. change the world's attitude...
— ashmytash (@averyashlay) February 27, 2015

i think we can all agree, the world needs a serious attitude adjustment.
— ashmytash (@averyashlay) February 27, 2015

how it's working

y'all should just get used to this.
this is how it's going to be for now.
i'm committed to so many things,
& some may see that as this awful thing,
but for me, i'm pretty sure that's just life. :)
& that's okay,
but things will have to rotate priority.

i didn't create this space for the desire to promote myself,
i created it out of need.
when things get so worked up,
worked up, worked up, worked up,
& then boom.
something inevitable happens. :)
& this space helps me rationalize,
it helps restore my perspective.
that is why i have this,
or pretty much anything.
it naturally serves some purpose that helps keep me going.
& that's awesome.

but it's not scheduled.
it happens when it happens.
when there's this overflow,
or a need for discipline in myself,
or etc...

so just know when you're getting it,
you're getting something real.
& that's awesome.
God works out the rest.
for now, that's how this is working.

this isn't a game.

sometimes i forget,
that only i can do what it is that i do.

we shouldn't feel threatened by our surroundings,
our peers,
because if you're being true to you,
no one can do what it is you do...
or how you do it.
i rest in that fact.
it eliminates fear.

i rarely spend time,
thinking about survival.
...strategies to stay relevant.
because there is only so much you can do on your own.
& honestly your efforts in that, are nearly irrelevant.

i mean, what i'm saying doesn't apply to everyone,
because i'm operating with God on my side,
while others are fighting against God.
attempting to do everything themselves,
not letting God act on their behalf.

but considering the circumstances in which i'm operating under...
i feel like this becomes less of a game, 'because i could lose that'
& more like life. :)